It is okay not to have a plan, Mithila Palkar
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| It is okay not to have a plan | Mithila Palkar |
Translator:
Sm Masum: Peter van de Ven (Clapping) (Tapping) (Banging) (Singing) (Song:
"Hi on the Cups") (Singing ends) (Applause) Some of you must have
seen the video of this song online, and I'll tell you the story of how I made
it. But before that,I have a question for all of you. How many of us over here
have had celebrity crushes? (Murmuring) Almost all of us, right? And I'm sure
some of us must have done something crazy to reach out to these crushes. This
friend of mine, one day, decided to pack his bags and leave his home in Baroda
and come to Mumbai to meet the love of his life. Ameesha Patel. (Laughter)
Well, OK, so he decided to do that. And he knew that he wanted to meet her in a
different capacity, not as a fan, because ... pride. And the easiest way to get
in touch with her was to get into showbiz, and he did. Eventually, over the
years, he realized that this was actually something that he liked doing, and he
stuck to it.
It's been 10 years now since he started acting, and Ameesha Patel
now is ... (Laughter) history in his life. So, you know like they say, life
happens to you when you're busy planning other things. This is a classic
example of that. Things don't always work according to plan. So let me tell you
something:it's OK to not have one. I did not have a plan. I had a passion,
which I decided to pursue, and eventually, everything fell into place. You
know, when I was five, my family used to encourage me to sing and dance in
front of guests, at family gatherings. And I used to be shy at first, maybe
even awkward, but I gave in to their requests. I realized that I was enjoying
being the entertainer. But this is the same family that conditioned me to
believe that the mantra to live a successful ideal life is you grow up, you
graduate, and you find a "decent" job.
This typical middle-class
Marathi family of mine, as expected, was not very thrilled about my acting
aspirations. Actually, back then, maybe even I wasn't very convinced about it,
because I didn't have a role model to point out to and say, "Hey, if she
can do it, I can too." Plus, I was comfortable with having a plan: you
grow up, you graduate, and you find a "decent" job. Remember? So,
while pursuing mass media in my graduate school, I happened to volunteer at a
theatre company and got to be a part of a youth theatre festival, which I
helped organize. I was happy because I got to be around the theatre world, and
my family was happy because I was doing event management, which was real work.
When I started working on this festival, that festival turned out to be a
turning point in my life, because when I witnessed actors perform on stage, I
realized that that's where I want to be.
I realized I wanted to be the
storyteller. I wanted to be the story, and I knew that if I did not pursue it,
I was going to be extremely restless and unhappy. So I gave into my gut, and I
decided to convince my family. But it took some courage and a lot of cajoling
from my family to finally give in, hesitantly so, but they gave in. I thought
it was not that bad a beginning. I had a bumpy start because I knew I wanted to
be an actor, and that was that. I wasn't sure if I wanted to do films, or if I
wanted to be part of television commercials or daily soaps, or if I wanted to
stick to the theatre. So I decided that I'd figure it out as I go along, and I
tried to do all the right things, like, I started looking for work, I started
auditioning, made sure I was on the radar. You know, as Mumbaikars, we are
trained to face rejection every single day, thanks to Rickshawalas.
Because no
matter where you want to go, you will have to go through at least three rejections
before some kind soul comes along. Little did I know that these Rickshawalas
are preparing me for the rejections will be facing in my life ahead. See, the
thing with auditions is that no matter how good or bad you were at it,
regardless of your performance, you should know that if an audition has to
translate into an offer, that is not in your control. What is in your control
is to give your best. And let me tell you, not a lot of those auditions
actually translated into offers, but it turned out to be some fantastic
learning experiences for me. It was not just for my skills, it was because I
also learned to build resilience. So, I'm sure this is something that we all
have experienced. Failure makes it very easy to give up, and if failure strikes
multiple times, it becomes even easier. But I realized that I shouldn't give
up, and I kept at it and I'm glad that I did, because, like with the
Rickshawalas, you never know who will actually give into your plea of taking
you to your destination. But just because six of them said "no" to
you in a row doesn't mean you'll give up on going home, right?
You will have to
find an alternative. You will have to hustle. Nothing is going to come easy.
Not having a plan actually turned out to be quite useful for me, because when I
was in the middle of trying to figure out what to do, I chanced upon the
internet. When I started with the Internet, which was about a year and a half
ago, we'd all been used to watching comedy sketches online, but the concept of
web series or web shows was pretty novel; not a lot of people had given into
it, yet. I thought it was a pretty interesting idea, and I thought I'll make
most of this opportunity. Over a period of time, I had built my network of
friends and mentors, who have been and still continue to be my biggest support
system. So they backed me up on this decision, and I decided to take the
plunge. When I started my web journey with my first web show, which was a news
satire comedy show on a YouTube channel still continue to work with it, I
realized the power of the Internet. Because the show got a boost from all over
the world; from different parts of the world people started writing to us. That
cup song, that happened on a whim, too. I was just chilling, one fine afternoon
at home, and I was playing the cups and singing different songs on it, and I
decided to make a video. So I called my friend and said, "Can you come
over?
I need somebody to hold the camera." She got her phone camera,and I'm
sitting at my house, and we recorded this, and I uploaded this video with the
"tring, tring" of the bicycle in the background - if you listen to it
keenly, I don't know what all other noises you'll be able to hear. But I put
that video up, anyway, and the attention that it got was unexpected. This
something that I did without too much planning, just for fun, turned outto be a
game-changer for me. It opened so many more avenues for me, gave me so many new
opportunities that it makes me wonder what it would have been like had I spent
the time to think and plan how to make a perfect video. You know, a lot of us
are forced to make very important decisions very early in life, and we're not
even sure what we want to do; I wasn't. And that is OK. The answer lies in
experimenting and doing so fearlessly. Everyone does not have a chalked-out
path. If you decide to be an actor, your journey and my journey is not
necessarily going to be the same.
You know, some prying uncles and aunties, or
some family members or family friends had asked me this: "Your sister is a
scientist; how come you chose to do this?" I mean, my elder sister, I do
look up to her, and she does inspire me, but I didn't have to become a
scientist to prove that. In fact, I don't thinkI've told her this, either, but
there was a point in my life where I wanted to do everything that she did. So,
she used to have long, silky straight hair; she still does. But when I was a
little kid,I used to have really short hair. So I used to tie a dupatta around
my head with a hairband, just to pretend to have hair like hers. I wanted to go
to the same school as hers, the same college. Eventually, I realized that it
was OKto not do what she was doing, and she was still going to be proud of me.
Albert Einstein once said: "If you judge a fish by its ability to climb
the tree, it's going to spend all its life believing that it's stupid."
You might not be good at one thing, but you will be better at three others. I
learned this the very hard way, but you cannot make everyone happy. What you
can do, however, is make yourself happy, and that is very, very important. So
be brave, have faith in yourself, figure out what makes you happy, and go do
it. Get a job, leave a job, dance, sing, fall in love, carve your own niche.
But most importantly: learn to embrace the randomness. Thank you. (Applause)
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